What is wrong with these sentences?

Some grammar rules (and embarrassing mistakes!) transcend the uniqueness of different regions and style guides. This new International Grammar section by OnlineBookClub.org ultimately identifies those rules thus providing a simple, flexible rule-set, respecting the differences between regions and style guides. You can feel free to ask general questions about spelling and grammar. You can also provide example sentences for other members to proofread and inform you of any grammar mistakes.

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Charlierabbit
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What is wrong with these sentences?

Post by Charlierabbit »

I had two errors in a recent review, but the editor left no comment on what is grammatically wrong with these sentences. Can someone please help me identify the errors so I can avoid them in the future?

"These are some questions Katherine Cullen challenges readers to consider in her book Honest Endings, which recounts her emotionally challenging three-year tenure as a hospice social worker."

"This makes the book effective as a personal memoir, but less helpful for inspiring structural change in the field of hospice care."

Thank you!
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Kavita Shah
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Post by Kavita Shah »

Charlierabbit wrote: 02 May 2021, 19:16 I had two errors in a recent review, but the editor left no comment on what is grammatically wrong with these sentences. Can someone please help me identify the errors so I can avoid them in the future?

"These are some questions Katherine Cullen challenges readers to consider in her book Honest Endings, which recounts her emotionally challenging three-year tenure as a hospice social worker."

"This makes the book effective as a personal memoir, but less helpful for inspiring structural change in the field of hospice care."

Thank you!
In the first one the title isn't in Italic.

"These are some questions Katherine Cullen challenges readers to consider in her book Honest Endings, which recounts her emotionally challenging three-year tenure as a hospice social worker."

And the second one should have an "an".

"This makes the book effective as a personal memoir, but less helpful for an inspiring structural change in the field of hospice care."
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Post by Juliet+1 »

The second sentence doesn't really need a comma before "but." Some editors take off points for commas that are not absolutely required.
Charlierabbit
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Post by Charlierabbit »

It seems the second sentence must have been the comma error.

I'm still stumped on the first one-- in my actual review, the book title is in italics (formatting was messed up when I pasted it into this post). It was counted as a grammatical error rather than not following the guidelines (which would have been the case for a non-italicized title).
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Post by PeterRabitt20 »

Charlierabbit wrote: 02 May 2021, 19:16 I had two errors in a recent review, but the editor left no comment on what is grammatically wrong with these sentences. Can someone please help me identify the errors so I can avoid them in the future?

"These are some questions Katherine Cullen challenges readers to consider in her book Honest Endings, which recounts her emotionally challenging three-year tenure as a hospice social worker."

"This makes the book effective as a personal memoir, but less helpful for inspiring structural change in the field of hospice care."

Thank you!
The first sentence sounds like "which" is part of a prepositional phrase. I'd remove the comma before which—next time either add "in which" without a comma or change "which" to "that"

In the second sentence, I'd remove the comma before "but"—the sentence following it isn't an independent clause.
Charlierabbit
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Post by Charlierabbit »

PeterRabitt20 wrote: 22 May 2021, 09:31
The first sentence sounds like "which" is part of a prepositional phrase. I'd remove the comma before which—next time either add "in which" without a comma or change "which" to "that"

In the second sentence, I'd remove the comma before "but"—the sentence following it isn't an independent clause.
Thank you. That is helpful!
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Post by Nonso Samuelson »

Charlierabbit wrote: 02 May 2021, 19:16 I had two errors in a recent review, but the editor left no comment on what is grammatically wrong with these sentences. Can someone please help me identify the errors so I can avoid them in the future?

"These are some questions Katherine Cullen challenges readers to consider in her book Honest Endings, which recounts her emotionally challenging three-year tenure as a hospice social worker."

"This makes the book effective as a personal memoir, but less helpful for inspiring structural change in the field of hospice care."

Thank you!
In the first sentence, the title of the book "Honest Endings" should have been italicized. Bear in mind that if you mention the title of a book series or the title of another book in your review—even if they are not the boom you're reading—they must be italicized as well.

In the second sentence, the conjunction "but" is joining an independent clause to a dependent clause, so the comma before "but" is wrong. If both clause were independent clauses, it wouldn't matter if you put a comma before "but" or not as that is mainly a matter of style.

I hope this helps.
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Post by Apurv Mittal »

Charlierabbit wrote: 02 May 2021, 19:16 I had two errors in a recent review, but the editor left no comment on what is grammatically wrong with these sentences. Can someone please help me identify the errors so I can avoid them in the future?

"These are some questions Katherine Cullen challenges readers to consider in her book Honest Endings, which recounts her emotionally challenging three-year tenure as a hospice social worker."

"This makes the book effective as a personal memoir, but less helpful for inspiring structural change in the field of hospice care."

Thank you!
A guideline for the usage of 'that' or 'which' while giving more information about the noun is -
If you want to communicate an essential info about the noun in this case the book, use 'that' without a comma. Else you may use 'which' with a comma.
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