Children Story: How to Be a Good Big Sibling

Use this forum to post short stories that you have written. This is for getting comments and constructive feedback. This is for original, creative works. You must post the actual text, no links.
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Amagine
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Re: Children Story: How to Be a Good Big Sibling

Post by Amagine » 31 Oct 2017, 22:34

Njengnjoro wrote:Great work of art, evoked a lot of emotions.
Thank you! :D
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PaeonkaE
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Post by PaeonkaE » 22 Nov 2017, 11:47

This poem is covering a field which usually gets forgotten in the big tumult of preparing the coming of a new baby in the house. The bigger siblings get immediately in the shadows and all the adult attention is focused on the new comer. (This I speak from experience as a bigger sibling.) It is very hurting and bitter for all the older children to lose the parents attention and admiration in a moment and as if get forgotten. They think to be less important and less loved. This story is a nice example how one may prepare the older children in the family to understand the big event and get a part of it. My best recommendations!

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Amagine
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Post by Amagine » 27 Nov 2017, 00:23

PaeonkaE wrote:This poem is covering a field which usually gets forgotten in the big tumult of preparing the coming of a new baby in the house. The bigger siblings get immediately in the shadows and all the adult attention is focused on the new comer. (This I speak from experience as a bigger sibling.) It is very hurting and bitter for all the older children to lose the parents attention and admiration in a moment and as if get forgotten. They think to be less important and less loved. This story is a nice example how one may prepare the older children in the family to understand the big event and get a part of it. My best recommendations!
Thank you so much! I truly appreciate it! :D ?
"Piglet noticed that even though he had a very small heart, it could hold a rather large amount of gratitude." -A.A Milne

"I am grateful for all the books that sparked my imagination." -Unknown

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CambaReviewer
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Post by CambaReviewer » 13 Feb 2018, 07:24

This was awesome!! Please consider publishing as a picture book. I think it will easily find its way into lots of family bookshelves and would make a good new baby gift for older siblings. I liked it very much! Well done!

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Monee1995
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Post by Monee1995 » 14 Feb 2018, 18:07

This was a heart warming reading. I loved how you were preparing he or she for their new sibling by explaining something's that they can do to become a good sibling. I think this will make the child not to feel left out.

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Chiffoe
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Post by Chiffoe » 24 Feb 2018, 16:05

... The style of the composition rhyms like poem.. So lovely.

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Post by Helen_Combe » 25 Feb 2018, 06:26

It’s a very nice piece, but I think if it’s aimed at children, it needs to be either poem or prose. Children like patterns and a poem that part rhymes or doesn’t follow a strict metre will frustrate them. The popularity of Dr Seuss is based on his perfect rhyme and metre.
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Post by Ekah Emmanuel » 08 Mar 2018, 04:26

After reading this lovely peom you would know that the poem is a guide and the guide is a poem, this is a guide to help an older baby take care his/her younger baby sibling, this guide would help older babies alot, especially those older babies who see their younger baby sibling as obstacles to them and their parents, if there is something like this in book stores I think all babies in their families would love themselves and live happily without hating each other at all. This peice of work brings about well brought up children who share a bound of love amongst themselves. This peice of work is the kind that would bring love amongst children in each and every family. I think the writer of this work should make more of this kind of work, publish this work and put it out to sale in different book stores. Nice work.

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Post by JIMBABS » 10 Mar 2018, 15:31

This is a well done write up, though the diction of it is a simple and straightforward but you are inconsistent in you rhyme choice. apart from that the work is educating.

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Chiffoe
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Post by Chiffoe » 27 Mar 2018, 06:24

Younger siblings usually earns the older ones sense of responsibility, also engulfs them with some amount of jealosy for earning every attraction and attention from family and friends.. Nice write up!

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Post by Biigggg » 31 Mar 2018, 06:42

How to be a good sibling, the poem is a good one, l can imagine a five year old waiting to meet, the newest member of the family, the baby, the level of excitement, it also teaches children to love their young siblings.

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CambaReviewer
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Post by CambaReviewer » 04 Apr 2018, 12:20

This poem about sibling rivalry is fabulous! I loved it. well done!

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