3 out of 4 stars
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“Where did I go wrong?” This is probably a question from a parent who is now concerned about his or her child. But often, it is discovered that this same parent must have ignored—partially or totally—his or her child, during the child’s growing-up stages. A time when children always have a lot of questions to ask; a time they seek attention, quality time, love, and care. But, do they get their desires? Or do they just get hugs and kisses? Or, perhaps, are they yelled at, and told to shut up? Or are they ignored, and treated as though they are a distraction?
Who Hears While Not Listening? is a book by Alim M. Bey that addresses this issue. Though in the Drama and Poetry genre category, to me, it is more of a non-fiction book. In it, Alim Bey stressed the importance of not only hearing but also listening and paying attention to our children or children around us—nieces, nephews, grand children, neighbours’ children, students, and so on—especially during their growing-up stages. He shared some of the scenes he had observed while he worked as a conductor for the New York City Transit Authority, and some incidences wherein he was involved.
I benefitted a lot from this book, and I believe any reader should as well. The things Alim said and the stories he shared were eye-opening. For instance, the story of Mildred Wendover, a girl who grew up amidst boys. Being a female, Mildred later started experiencing many changes in her body, and while comparing herself with her brothers, shame and insecurity started setting in. All because some people failed to listen—Rebecca Wendover, her mother, and the other women in her family.
I admire the passion with which Alim wrote this book; he practically poured out his heart, perhaps, due to his experiences. Imagine a child growing up in a home where pets are treated a whole lot better than a human child. He went through that, and much more. Unfortunately, Alim—growing up under such upbringing—grew up to also treat his first child with cruelty.
There is nothing I dislike about this book. Although the frequent interruptions with “Who’s hearing while not listening?” was distracting at first, I later got used to it. However, as touching that, I feel “Who hears while not listening?”—the title—should have been used in its stead, that is, I’m assuming it is not an error.
I rate this book 3 out of 4 stars as I found quite a number of errors in it; errors which did not, in any way, affect the readability, though. Who Hears While Not Listening? is a must-read for not only parents but for all adults, as it is inevitable that we all, at one time or the other, will have a child coming to us with questions or concerns, and perhaps, you may be the person the child needs at that time. Will you listen?
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Who Hears While Not Listening?
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