Review of Finding Yourself After a Breakup for Men

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Hubre De Klerk
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Review of Finding Yourself After a Breakup for Men

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[Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Finding Yourself After a Breakup for Men" by Tristan Brody.]
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5 out of 5 stars
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Usually, when a relationship comes to an end, there are a lot of questions about why and what happened. Only afterward do you realize there were red flags from the start, but usually while being in your 'honeymoon' phase of your relationship, you only notice the things you want to notice. This book tells us what red flags are and how they look. This will maybe even help you see them before it is too late to either start a relationship that is doomed or address those red flags and find a solution.

When you finally notice the communication has stopped and you don't really want to be home, it needs to be attended to immediately if you want to save your relationship. But before attending to the issues, you need to find out what led to the changes. What about when those small details and words of love started feeling like a chore or just routine? When did it stop being sincere? These are scary thoughts, and we usually only realize these things are happening when it is almost too late already. Either fighting all the time or sudden big lifestyle changes are huge red flags of a relationship on the rocks, or someone might be fooling around.

Once the relationship is either saved or ended, how do you move forward? Do you go down a guilt hole, or do you find closure and move forward? What does closure mean? What is denial? There are so many questions and even self-doubt when a relationship ends that you need to know how to handle that, and the author gave excellent pointers and advice in this book. I could relate to each of the seven steps after a breakup, and I never realized that there are different types of denial. Anyone who has been through a bad breakup also knows the anger that follows those constant questions! The author explains what is rooted in that anger and how we can handle it. There is also a very important discussion regarding moving out if a marriage fails and the lasting consequences it can have. When married and busy with a divorce, moving out may be your biggest mistake. To find out why the author is saying this, you will have to read his book.

This book goes into so many deeper issues than just feelings and your mental state. How a breakup affects your home, children, work, finances—you name it, and it is in this book. This book is written for men, but I do believe that women could also learn a lot from it, as the roles in this book can just as easily be reversed in today’s society. I think all of us know how a breakup or divorce can personally affect us, especially emotionally and mentally, but we don’t always think of the rest. If you have been together for a long time, split bills, stayed together, have children, etc., all of this will get affected, and it is very scary. This book brings all of these things out in the open and tells you to open your eyes. Any harsh decisions you make when heartbroken, confused, depressed, etc. could have a much bigger effect on you and your life than you realize. Reading this book will show you that there are no exaggerations here. I especially enjoyed the part about responsible parenting, as I have experienced this personally with my ex.

I would rate Finding Yourself After a Breakup for Men by Tristan Brody a perfect 5 out of 5 stars. I found no errors in this book, and it was professionally written. Even though this book is written for men, it isn’t biased, and it could help women as well. I didn’t spot anything that I disliked, and I enjoyed the summary after each chapter. I don’t care who you are if you are in a relationship, married, or single; I recommend you read this book, as you don’t know what is around the next bend!

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Finding Yourself After a Breakup for Men
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