3 out of 4 stars
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The cover page captured my attention. It depicts a lone woman walking in a forest as she prayerfully reads a holy book. The Gift of Finding God’s Love is the spiritual memoir of Teniecka Drake. Her story is full of joy that comes after turning from victim to victor. As a married woman who has four beautiful children, she no longer lives with her husband. She decided to go back to her parents after ten years of emotional, verbal, mental, physical, spiritual, and digital abuse.
“It does not matter if you are a man or a woman. The bottom line is, nobody deserves to be hurt,” notes the author. She advises victims of domestic violence to overcome the shame and inform people they trust. What could have compelled her to stay with her spouse, despite so many years of suffering? It was because marriage is a covenant, and she did not wish to break it. Drake desired her children to live with both parents. Their Dad promised every day that he would change, but he never did. She kept hoping until one day she was told, “He has been showing you his true colors. What are you, color-blind?” The wife and mother could not live in denial any more.
In less than 50 pages, the book includes poems that are heart-wrenching. They express domestic violence in its reality through poignant language. Nevertheless, the story also reveals how the survivor has been touched by God’s unconditional love and support from her parents as well as her church. This is what I most liked. One who leans on God is never alone. Drake desires to share the lessons she has learned from her personal experiences. She lists the signs that cannot be ignored in married life and urges women to trust in their gut feeling. The writer also mentions the dos and don’ts in such situations. All this is intermingled with the best selection of biblical quotations.
Since it is the survivor’s first book, it contains grammatical and formatting errors. Readers do not have to agree with all her views, but there’s a lot to make them reflect. I have worked with women’s organizations and counseled victims of domestic violence. Women are known to endure in silence, but there comes a time when enough is enough. God cannot see her suffering anymore, even if she must separate from her spouse for a meaningful and happy future for herself and her children. Fewer men are victims of spousal abuse.
I am pleased to award this guidebook 3 out of 4 stars. If it had been professionally edited and formatted, I would have rated it 4 stars. I wholeheartedly recommend The Gift of Finding God’s Love for married adults. It is not meant for children. Parents of young couples should read this memoir. Pastors in family ministry will also gain something from Drake’s experiences.
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The Gift of Finding God's Love:
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