Reconciliation

Use this forum to discuss the September 2020 Book of the month, " "Kalayla" by Jeannie Nicholas.
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ohlendorfbe
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Re: Reconciliation

Post by ohlendorfbe »

Kalayla's resentment evolved from Maureen's resentment, which began at her marriage to Jamal and her famly's desertion of her. I think that even if Jamal had lived, Maureen would have still resented her family and they her for many years. Something more than Jamal had to change in order to fix the resentments.
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Post by Damian Keyes »

I feel that if this scenario did happened, then Maureen will still be waiting for her parents to forgive first. Jamal did not like how Maureen said her parents were dead if though they did not care for him. So, if this book was about Jamal, Maureen and Kalayla moving into Lena's apartment building, then with Lena and Jamal's guidance she would have eventually met and talked with her parents. I definitely think Kalayla would be less sassy and angry because he will be able to teach her how to control her anger and the discussion of race would be easier.
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Huini Hellen
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Post by Huini Hellen »

I know that the absence of either parent in a child's upbringing is unreplaceable and cannot be substituted for anything. So then, had Jamal been alive, maybe Kalayla would have developed some survival techniques from him.
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Post by kdstrack »

I don't think it would have made any difference. Jamal didn't say anything at the beginning and just let the lie continue. He eased his conscience by saying that it was Maureen's responsibility since it was her family, and she had initiated the lie about the explosion. Neither of them were willing to speak the truth. Kalayla had to find the truth on her own. The reconciliation came through two children who weren't aware of the past enmity between the families.
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Post by The_Vivian »

Truth is yes, indeed Kalayla's issues were impacted by racism, but I feel that it would have been better and easier to cope with had her father lived. However, as far as the issue of reconciliation goes, I do not think that it would have happened any sooner had he lived, because it was clear that the relationship between Jamal, Maureen and her family was going nowhere while he was alive, and his living would not have solved anything, rather, it would have continued to put more pressure on all of them.
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Post by Echezonachukwu »

Well, Jamal's death wouldn't have affected the outcome much. Resentments were already flying through the rough. Since Maureen's family didn't accept him that much, this might take its toll on the father-daughter relationship between Jamal and Kalayla
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Post by Luluwa79 »

Laurina_Olowo wrote: 02 Sep 2020, 08:50 I don't think so. If he were alive, I think her parents would still be hiding into their resentments.
But won't they reconcile and forgo all resentments because of their child?
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Post by engarl »

I think the one thing that really stuck out to me about Maureen's story is that she eventually learned that she had depended on Jamal as her "load bearing wall" just like her father depended on her mother. Eventually, she learns that both she and Jamal should have served as joint load bearing partners and she begins the process of regaining her confidence back. I can't say whether or not Maureen would have eventually developed her confidence if Jamal had lived, but I do think it would have taken longer. Unfortunately, I think that Kalayla would have been grown by that point and would have gone her whole childhood without that essential support from her mother. I also agree with the above comments that Jamal didn't seem to be resolving issues prior to his death, but he could have changed...it's just a matter of when.
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Post by Paige Alvarado »

I feel like Jamal being alive would eliminate a need for Maureen to work so many hours, thus allowing her to be home with Kalayla more. I don't think Kalayla would have met Lena and gone to the gym and met her grandfather if this were the case. I also believe that Jamal being alive would keep the wedge between Maureen and her family.
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Post by Heidadel »

It is the presence of a child that has the ability to unite families in most cases. However, in this case, the absence of Jamal played a part in bringing reconciliation, which I believe would not have happened easily if Jamal was still in Maureen's life.
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Post by AlexisLib »

I think that if Jamal had not died, the reconciliation with Maureen's family would have not happened or taken much longer. It's easier to "ignore" some facts if the person isn't around. For example, I've seen this happen with gay people; when they are single and not bringing a partner to family events it's easier for the family to accept, but once they bring a partner everything can break apart if the parents or siblings don't really feel comfortable with it. With Jamal being gone, it's easier for them to accept that Maureen married him and had a child with him.

It's interesting about Maureen's family not trying to reconcile once Kalayla was born. I've seen parents who were mad at their child and not speaking to them put that aside and come back around once a child is born. Given that, I really thought Maureen's family would never accept her again. But time can make changes and especially as Maureen's parents get older and feel more mortal or vulnerable can influence them to try to forgive. I really liked how this book showed that and Lena opening up her life to something new at an older age.
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Post by Nelson Lyric »

Jamal character was positively discribed. I think if he lived, he could have influenced most of Maureen's decisions. So, definitely reconciliation could have been the song of the family.
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Post by Sou Hi »

Hm, good question. One thing for sure, if Jamal was alive, Maureen's burden would be lessened, and she might have more time for Kalayla. This means Kalayla would less likely grow up to the current her with her resentment towards her relatives. But I'm not sure about the reconcilement. They were not on good terms with their family even before Jamal's death, so there are no promises they would mellow out if he lived longer. Unless all of them try to do something, things would not change.
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Post by elisathelvarik »

I am a firm believer that things happen for a reason, so to analyze this fictitious situation is quite interesting. There is a possibility of reconciliation, but I don't think the family would gain a very strong bond. His death caused sympathy and more understanding even through the toughest times. Imagine how things would change. Kaylayla could be totally different. Lena may have never come into her life.
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Post by Bukola02 »

I think there would been a lot of resentment between both parent if Jamal was still alive. Because Maureen’s family would still not have accepted Jamal and that will continue to put make things more complicated for Kalayla. His death made things more easier.
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