Team Rachel or team main protagonist?

Use this forum to discuss the January 2020 Book of the month, "Man Mission: 4 men, 15 years, 1 epic journey", by Eytan Uliel.
Post Reply
User avatar
Julius_
In It Together VIP
Posts: 730
Joined: 17 May 2019, 01:15
Favorite Author: Roger Glasgow
Favorite Book: Mythic Worlds and the One You Can Believe In
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 120
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-julius.html
Latest Review: Dynomike: Pay It Forward by Frankie B. Rabbit
fav_author_id: 187887

Re: Team Rachel or team main protagonist?

Post by Julius_ »

ViziVoir wrote: 04 Jan 2020, 18:00 Honestly, I feel for both of them. I think they both had flaws in their approaches to interpersonal relationships, to say nothing of their different priorities, and it really seems like they shouldn't have been together to begin with.
Yeah, they were very incompatible. It looks like what the protagonist wanted in a wife was lacking in Rachel. Rachel too wanted a husband who would have time with her and the family. These people we're completely the opposite of what each wanted for a spouse.
We're all philosophers. When there's a tough choice to be made, when faced with the facts of birth,love or death or simply when thinking about what we want to do with our lives.
Magdalena123
Posts: 4
Joined: 29 Oct 2019, 04:42
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 3
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-magdalena123.html
Latest Review: Man Mission by Eytan Uliel

Post by Magdalena123 »

I definitively agree with you, Rachel was not supporting enough. I understand that him leaving once a year to go on an adventure without her isn't ideal, as she'll be left alone with the kids. But honestly? He worked every day to support his family because she refused to work, so he deserves a couple of days a year to himself. She never hesitated to voice her opinion and feelings about him and their lives, and he stuck to a job he hated to make her happy. Team main protagonist all the way, with the slightest sympathy for Rachel who practically raised her children by herself.
Neha++
Posts: 105
Joined: 10 Aug 2019, 06:25
Favorite Book: Adrift
Currently Reading: The Billionaires’ Handbook
Bookshelf Size: 150
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-neha.html
Latest Review: We are Voulhire: Someone Else's End by Matthew Tysz

Post by Neha++ »

Rachel and main protagonist were unable to sort out their relationship problems. They both refused talking about their problems that caused miscommunication between them. I think they both were responsible for their failed marriage.
User avatar
Falconcrest
Posts: 440
Joined: 23 Jun 2019, 13:09
Currently Reading: Brass Rail
Bookshelf Size: 200
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-falconcrest.html
Latest Review: Killing Abel by Michael Tieman

Post by Falconcrest »

I suppose, it was quite evident that Rachel didn't approve of the protagonist Man Missions. She basically saw it as a ploy, for her husband to run away from his responsibilities. This did not help the relationship, as it only made Rachael feel more frustrated. Speaking from personal experiences it is always good to give each other, enough room to breath and not suffocate one's partner or spouse.
Sugarlump54
Posts: 32
Joined: 04 Nov 2019, 13:39
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 26
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-sugarlump54.html
Latest Review: Man Mission by Eytan Uliel

Post by Sugarlump54 »

Marriage is so dang hard and when communication stops it’s bad. I sympathize with both characters and don’t blame either one one for what they did and who they are. I feel the same way as one responder here that the marriage seemed kind of doomed from the beginning. Maybe they married because that was supposed to be the next step in life, not because they were meant to be together.
User avatar
Brenda Creech
Previous Member of the Month
Posts: 3382
Joined: 09 Mar 2019, 13:34
Favorite Author: Mary Pat Ferron Caines
Favorite Book: The Reel Sisters
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 356
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-brenda-creech.html
Latest Review: Was She Crying for Me? by Jerry Hyde
fav_author_id: 253250

Post by Brenda Creech »

Julius_ wrote: 21 Jan 2020, 03:50
B Creech wrote: 04 Jan 2020, 12:20 Rachel did come across as a nagging wife at times. However, the main protagonist was totally selfish in many ways. I like the concept of the Man Missions, I think that was an awesome way to spend time with friends. However, I think the women should have had the same opportunity to go away for an annual outlet and let the guys stay home with the kids!
Yes, or maybe the protagonist should have considered organizing for a bit of family holiday where they would spend with the family together. Hiking and going places. I have a feeling that Rachel felt that her husband didn't have time for her and the kids. Leaving Rachel to go out alone would change these feelings either.
Those are very good points! I think a family holiday is an absolute necessity!
B. Creech
"Like beauty in the eyes, the divinity of the rose may be in the nose that smells it, and the lover that beholds it." Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
mhopkins
Posts: 12
Joined: 02 Jan 2020, 09:35
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 14
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-mhopkins.html
Latest Review: Mark Twain and the Art of Swearing by Lyle Larsen

Post by mhopkins »

I think the hard part is that we only see the one side of the relationship. They both definitely had their faults, but I did not like Rachel's character at all. She always seemed upset by everything. If she resented his Man Missions, then she should have initiated her own "Woman Missions" doing things that she enjoyed to get a break. When she kept turning down his intimacy advances, I was pretty certain she was involved in an affair herself and was surprised that that never came out. Their whole marriage seemed rocky with a lack of communication and support of each other.
adamgreenrock
Posts: 140
Joined: 13 Mar 2019, 03:21
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 16
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-adamgreenrock.html
Latest Review: Away To Me, My Love by Naomi McDonald

Post by adamgreenrock »

I'd choose the protagonist. While Rachel has some good reasons to be negative towards him (being neglectful at times), I found it to be a bit dumb as the Man Missions' gone on. She could've reason him to lay low on the annual Man Mission for a while or i don't know, actually have a heart-to-heart conversation about this. But I guess marriage can make you argue a lot and be blinded by personal problems.
User avatar
Megapede
Posts: 58
Joined: 17 Mar 2019, 23:50
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 15
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-megapede.html
Latest Review: Masters and Bastards by Christopher J. Penington

Post by Megapede »

mhopkins wrote: 21 Jan 2020, 15:55 I think the hard part is that we only see the one side of the relationship. They both definitely had their faults, but I did not like Rachel's character at all. She always seemed upset by everything. If she resented his Man Missions, then she should have initiated her own "Woman Missions" doing things that she enjoyed to get a break. When she kept turning down his intimacy advances, I was pretty certain she was involved in an affair herself and was surprised that that never came out. Their whole marriage seemed rocky with a lack of communication and support of each other.
I agree that Rachel was quite stubborn about the protagonist's man missions sometimes to the point of obstinacy.
"Forget everything that you think you know." - Doctor Strange
User avatar
xoxoAnushka
Posts: 234
Joined: 03 Jan 2020, 03:37
Favorite Book: "Better dead than divorced"
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 34
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-xoxoanushka.html
Latest Review: That Guy What Kill Topsy by Peter Wood Cotterill

Post by xoxoAnushka »

Cotwani wrote: 03 Jan 2020, 08:17 I know poor communication is a verified relationship killer. All the same, I think Rachel's attitude played a big role in the final fall-out. I mean, I found her unsupportive (heck, she was opposed to man mission from day 1), selfish (wouldn't go to work), bitter and a loner (she didn't reach out to the "wives committee).

On the other hand, maybe its just that the main protagonist's character (whose name I don't remember seeing) was better fleshed out. We didn't get to hear her side of the story.

What do you opine?
Yup, it's true that we didn't get to know her perspectives, obviously they both led their life in a way that they've been bound to compromised( flawed or not) as well as the choices that they've made.
User avatar
Chelsey Coles
Posts: 438
Joined: 04 Oct 2018, 23:32
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 99
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-chelsey-coles.html
Latest Review: Donny and Mary Grace's California Adventures by Catherine A. Pepe

Post by Chelsey Coles »

Sugarlump54 wrote: 21 Jan 2020, 11:08 Marriage is so dang hard and when communication stops it’s bad. I sympathize with both characters and don’t blame either one one for what they did and who they are. I feel the same way as one responder here that the marriage seemed kind of doomed from the beginning. Maybe they married because that was supposed to be the next step in life, not because they were meant to be together.
I feel exactly the same. No, it doesn't make it okay that he cheated, that they didn't communicate, or that she was unsupportive. I think they both lacked the guts to take responsibility for their actions and how it affected one another.

You bring up another good point. When he first mentioned he was going to propose to Rachel,.... I dunno, after only four months of dating, if I recall correctly? I literally wrote in my notes that it seemed wayyyy to soon. Like you said, perhaps it was just the next step in their lives they felt obligated to take. Perhaps if they got married after a few more Man Missions, then they'd really see how things went.

But I'm not sure. One thing's for sure, marriage is hard. :eusa-think:
“It's far less important to me to be liked these days than to be understood.” :sad-teareye:
― Lionel Shriver, We Need to Talk About Kevin
User avatar
Tobewankenobe
Posts: 83
Joined: 18 Jan 2020, 14:37
Currently Reading: Voulhire
Bookshelf Size: 58

Post by Tobewankenobe »

I think that they both had their hands to play in that relationship. They were more interested in their own gratification, which actually makes a lot of sense. Love can be very very very hard, the answer is rarely "I will drop my pursuits to better meet all of my partner's needs." No one wants that, anyway, right? I know if I had to suppress my passions for the sake of my partner it would very easily bleed into resenting them. The amount of selflessness it can sometimes require is why working relationships are, in my opinion, the exception and not the rule.
User avatar
Leyla Ann
Posts: 384
Joined: 21 Oct 2019, 13:40
Favorite Author: Jane Austen
Favorite Book: Call Me by Your Name
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 69
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-leyla-ann.html
Latest Review: How To Be Successful by M. Curtis McCoy
fav_author_id: 2379

Post by Leyla Ann »

Indeed I think that we, as readers, will eventually be biased towards the main characters and against Rachel. As objective as I can get, I'd say it all lies in the lack of communication and the coping mechanisms that only sleep that fact off rather than fix it up.
People who read are hiders. They hide who they are. People who hide don't always like who they are.
Nkoo
Posts: 778
Joined: 24 May 2019, 08:32
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 124
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-nkoo.html
Latest Review: 50 Fabulous Women by Janiece McCarthy

Post by Nkoo »

When a marriage relationship is lacking in communication, then that is a recipe for some ugly things and even divorce in the foreseeable future if they don't retrace their steps. The protagonist works so hard throughout the year and therefore, I also think he deserves to play hard too; a week of man mission is appropriate reward. The wives committee should have organized their own ladies-only annual trip as well to balance things out. Raising children and being a stay at home mum is equally a full-time job. They should have agreed on a compromise.
User avatar
Rachel Lea
Posts: 621
Joined: 25 Feb 2019, 19:29
Favorite Book: Adrift
Currently Reading: Man Mission
Bookshelf Size: 117
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-rachel-lea.html
Latest Review: Serendipity Mystery: Diary of a Snoopy Cat by R.F. Kristi

Post by Rachel Lea »

Both the main character and Rachel were very flawed and human, but I agree that Rachel’s poor attitude played a major part in how everything turned out. She struck me as very self-absorbed and entitled.
"A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies... The man who never reads lives only one." -- George R.R. Martin :techie-studyingbrown:
Post Reply

Return to “Discuss "Man Mission" by Eytan Uliel”